It was the time of year when dusk arrives noticeably earlier in the evening. It was a night that The Girl works late and so I was out on the kitchen deck burning dinner on the new BBQ in preparation for her arrival home. The smell of smoking chicken against the backdrop of our forest was a satisfying experience as I sat back and took it all in.

Then the doorbell rang.

WTF, I think as I get up. We generally don’t enjoy unexpected visitors and around this time, I was becoming a little aggravated by Y’s drop-by’s. As I approached the front door, I saw B standing outside.

Pleasantries were exchanged and I ushered her in through the kitchen and out to the deck so that I could keep an eye on my chicken. I sensed that something was on her mind.

“So what brings you over all by yourself,” I asked. We were both sitting now.

“I wanted to talk to you about The Girl,” she said.

“Uh huh?”

“Well she was over the other day with Y.”

“Uh huh?”

“My daughter and her friend saw them coming out of the forest together and her friend started saying things.”

“Uh huh?”

“And other people have seen them walking together on the street.”

“Uh huh?”

“I don’t think that’s proper,” she said. She was very obviously concerned, but I also got the feeling that she was a little confused about something.

“Why not?” I said.

“Well it’s not right for the two of them to be alone together.”

“You and I are alone together right now,” I said.

“No this is different,” she said. She was becoming more agitated but confused. She continued, “Other neighbours have also seen them.”

“In case you’re not aware, I do know all about The Girl’s visit to your place the other day. I know about the walk into the forest and I also know about the rude way that you treated her. Both dogs were with them, didn’t you ask your daughter’s friend what they could possibly have been doing in the forest while the two dogs were running around loose?”

“Oh.”

“Yes,” I repeated, nodding.

“Well you shouldn’t allow her to come over like that. It’s ok if I’m with them, but not if they are alone.”

“She can do whatever she wants. If you want to restrict the relationship, you talk to your husband,” I said trying not to show that I was getting pissed.

“No, she’s the one who needs to stay away!”

“Let me tell you something that you might not realise. One person can love another person and do the things and have the relationship that people in love have. However, two people can be in a marriage whether they are in love or not,” I said. I looked at her and she looked back at me. I continued, “It’s not love that keeps a marriage together. It’s trust. Not only do I love The Girl, but I also trust her. You obviously have issues with Y.”

“No, she can’t be trusted because she told me how much she likes that latin singer and that she would run away with him.”

“Yeah and she tells me that too. Do you seriously think that would happen?”

That slightly confused state that B was in earlier had quickly given away to mild anger now. I started to realise by this point in the conversation that her plan was backfiring. She had come over hoping to inject enough innuendo so as to get me angry with The Girl. Instead, I was getting angry at her.

“People are saying things about them,” she said.

“People say things about everyone,” I said.

“Well I don’t want them alone together!”

“Then you need to tell your husband also. I don’t understand why people seem to only be talking about them and not about you being over here at least three times this last summer alone with me. Don’t you think they’re talking about you and me also?” I said.

“She’s more likely to cheat.”

“What?” I must have started turning red by now. It was darkening outside though, so my anger probably wasn’t visible.

“Yeah, her father cheated.”

“Yes, and she has told you because of her history with that, and what an asshole her father is, cheating is intolerable and inexcusable to her. There’s no way she would do that as long as she’s married.”

“Dr. Phil says that people learn from their parents and do the same as they grow up,” she said authoritatively.

“Whatever. Anyway she’s coming home soon, so I think it’s best if you’re not here when she arrives. I’ll let her know that you were over and what your concerns are.”

“I’ll talk to Y and maybe we can all get together and talk in a couple of days,” she said standing up.

“We’ll see. I think it’s best if we don’t get together at all anymore. But don’t worry, I’ll let her know you were over,” I said.

Suddenly I heard the garage door opener activate. I realised I had about 30 seconds to get B out of the house before The Girl arrived. I started ushering her out semi-forcibly, but she just took so long to get her stuff together that…

The entry door from the garage opened and The Girl entered.

B saw The Girl and her entire demeanor changed from mildly annoyed and agitated to full blown anger.

“Hi,” The Girl said with a smile.

“Hi,” I said, pushing B towards the front door, “B is just leaving, she came over to talk about a few things but I’ll tell you all about it in a sec.”

B started walking towards The Girl, “I want to talk to you!”

I said, “No! You’re leaving now. I’ll talk to her.”

B looked at me, unsure which way she should go, but I took her indecision as an opportunity to more forcibly lead her to the front door and out.

Once I relayed the story to The Girl, more hell broke loose. Geez, did she ever get pissed off. She was able to control herself and not call or go over to their house but what lay in store for us now? Was B angry enough at us to damage our property when we weren’t home? After a crazy conversation like that, how crazy was she really?

Next: The Mind of a Lunatic.